To Do

1. George Clooney
2. Throw out or give away every little and large thing I don't need any more.
3. Translate the English section of the Schoeller & Stahl/Austermann website without deleting the German section.
4. Knit a cardigan for my landscape gardener's friends' 3- month-old baby before he's old enough to smoke, drink, have sex and vote.
5. Crochet flowers, birds and various twee but cute fancies for various shop fronts in St. Windy.
6. Get my eyebrows tweaked and eyelashes dyed before my eyebrows suffocate me and I die.
7. That cute German actor Florian David Fitz  
8. and ... Til Schweiger 
   
9. Actually ride a motorbike like this (as driver!) rather than sit on someone else's outside a pub and get told off. 

10.  Pimp and primp all those lovely second-hand clothes I bought.

11.  Paint my bedroom and sew curtains in that gorgeous Bollywood fabric which I chose over the cutsie Kath Kidston fabric which I almost bought yesterday.

12.  Remember to eat regular meals. Correction: remember to eat.

13.  Tell my sons that I absolutely adore them but have resigned as Cook, Laundress, Nun, Bottle-Washer and Mumsy Supreme.

14.  Sing a selection of Chansons: for example - Marlene vs. Madonna with my spitfire (Italian ancestry) hairdresser who I trust, totally, to tweak my hair into Diva-dom and who sings in two Rock bands and can out-Tina Tina Turner when she belts out Nutbush City Limits.

15. Take singing and piano lessons. Already booked for after the school hols!

16. Write up the knitting patterns for my joint collection, in cahoots with the Divine Lady Honeycourt,and find knitters to knit 'em up in time for the photo session in a couple of weeks.

17. Do up my eeny weeny polka dot bikini-sized bathroom.

18. Stop sending PLATONICally loving e-mails to people I care about who don't want to know.

19. Stop answering the door when the doorbell rings. Stop answering the phone when the phone rings.

20. Spend less time on Facebook and more time knitting, crocheting and sewing.

21. Sean Connnery

22. Colin Farrell

23. Marry Jim Carrey    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNE69WyL0U0

24. Visit a nail salon without apologising for the state of my hands and nails.

25. Spend at least a year travelling around the US and visiting my family and friends.

26. Organise and take part (the STARRING role of course) in a Flash Mob in a local supermarket, railway station, airport or town square.

27. Buy a creme coloured motor scooter. And ride around town.

28. Get Natalie to my hairdresser for a cut and tone.

29. Blow up all the local fitness studios.

30. Send the next married man, who tells me his wife doesn't understand him, packing and tell him I don't understand him, nor do I want to, either.

31. Book a week in a swanky health spa. DONE!

32. Feel excited about having a whole week to myself in a swanky health spa. DONE!